anger management

I don't get angry. Not really. I've had several moments but I can probably count them on one hand... maybe two. Sometimes I think that maybe I should. The whole Freudian psychology thing about repression. But so far I haven't experienced any adverse effects from being mostly anger free so maybe I'm repression free. There simply aren't many people or situations that can get me that worked up. The only ones who've ever managed to truly do that are my parents, brother and sister. No one knows quite how to push your buttons like an immediate family member. But for the most part those episodes took place in my childhood. As I grew older I learned to let things roll off my back because they weren't worth the energy. There's still the occaisional frustration due to interactions with these folks I love but anger has certainly been replaced by understanding. The only person outside of my family (and perhaps a member of a competing sports team) who's ever gotten me that worked up was a guy I was dating (and I use this term loosely). One night he randomly went off on me about how he didn't want to get into a relationship and said some really mean things (inebriated). Now this was a guy I never saw myself getting into a relationship with so certainly hadn't mentioned such a thing in any shape or form but he wouldn't listen to me. I was angry for about a week over his meanness but once I chilled out I realized how much that had hurt me and don't think I've been angry since.

The reason I'm thinking about anger is due to an incident at the grocery store last night. The grocery store was having momentary problems with some of their cash registers. This resulted in long lines of people waiting to eventually check out. For most of us this wasn't a big deal. Everything can't always go smoothly. I used the time to catch up on text messages and glance at magazines I would never buy in real life. One man didn't see things in quite the same way and went off on any employee in the vicinity. He was irate that one line had been redirected to another line with a now operating cash register but his hadn't (I was also standing in the same line). Now I understand how that could be frustrating; however, the woman behind him and I simply stepped over to a line with a working cash register. So we had to wait a couple extra minutes. In the grand scheme of things that isn't a big deal. Waiting hours for your blood pressure to go down (particularly for someone a little older) seemed like a much bigger deal to me. He continued to yell at the clerks and managers who came to see what was going on. He poked his finger in the face of the sweet young manager who came over trying to help. Everyone else in these long lines were looking at him like he was loco.

I mostly felt sorry for him. People who get that worked up about the little stuff cannot have happy lives. And research (look up the stats) shows that they live shorter and less healthy lives. I have yet to encounter anything or anyone to get angry over that's worth that. Yet, you see this fairly often. People ranting and raving over seemingly nothing. And they do it in public. That's the scariest part. Because if they act like that in public, I can't imagine how they must act in the privacy of their own home. Now I understand that people'll get angry on occaision (as I've done so myself) but I try to avoid being around anyone who's that way on any sort of regular basis. You never know how short a fuse they have and I don't want to be at any end of it.



Dude at the grocery store needs this

sports at the grocery store

I was at the grocery store Saturday morning getting some things for work that day. Despite having to work on Saturday (not that I still necessarily agreed with it)I was in a pretty good mood, which motivated the man (I wouldn't necessarily say he was homeless but he was certainly a little out there) behind me to start telling me about how our respective cashier loved the Clippers but the one next to him loved the Lakers and how they'd go back and forth. He asked me if I was a basketball fan. I was tempted to answer, am I a basketball fan?! But he didn't know that so instead I told him that I was. He asked whether I supported the Clippers or the Lakers. I said, "Neither. I'm a Pistons fan!" He looked surprised but unantagonistic, which is not what I typically expect from LA fans, and asked how long I've lived here. I said, "Almost five years." He said, "And you haven't converted?" I said, "Never! I've been a fan since birth." He nodded his head as though it made sense. He then began to give our cashier a little bit of lip regarding the Clippers performance the night before. Next thing you knew all of the middle aged men in line (I was the only person who didn't fit that category) were chatting sports with me and very excited about this. As I paid for my groceries they all said good-bye to me and told me to stay a sports fan. I assured them I would and walked out of the grocery store with enough street cred to last me at least through the year.